The open-minded ones in New York and Hollywood are having hissy fits over a quip made by Domenico Dolce of Dolce & Gabbana about the kinds of kids their gay friends are raising. “You are born to a mother and a father, or at least that’s how it should be. I call children of chemistry, synthetic children. Rented uterus, semen chosen from a catalog.”

Elton John, who was engaged to a woman in the 1960s, married another gal in the 1980s, and then finally settled down with his boyfriend, is furious with Dolce. That’s because Sir Elton, who is no longer Questioning his sexual orientation (the “Q” in LGBTQ stands for Questioning—if there are two “Q’s” the other stands for “Queer”), takes Dolce’s comments to heart: he and his buddy are raising two children who are not, obviously, the result of their homosexual relationship. He has called for a boycott.

The celebs are so angry that some have threatened to burn their Dolce & Gabbana pants. Others are literally apoplectic: they cannot speak. Still others, not knowing whose side to take—all the parties to this controversy are homosexuals—are feverishly waiting it out.

Just before and after 2000, celebs were laughing heartily when Dolce & Gabbana released a line of clothes studded with Catholic imagery. What really got them howling was the long silk skirt with a big embroidery of Our Blessed Mother and Child; Mary’s head was provocatively placed in the pelvic area. When this was put on the market in 1998, Bill Donohue objected. But actor Robert Sean Leonard loved it, calling it “visual birth control.” Michael Douglas opined, “Appropriate place for the Madonna’s head. Jesus, talk about an Immaculate Conception.”

It is telling that the foolhardy celebs aren’t yucking it up this time. Guess we all have our hot buttons.

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