GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS
Catalyst June Issue 2000
There is medicine for those who can’t separate fantasy from reality but there’s no cure when it’s self-induced. Consider two public persons, neither of whom is unaccustomed to making publicly embarrassing statements: tennis champ Martina Navratilova and Episcopal Bishop John Shelby Spong.
Navratilova was recently interviewed by CNN about gay rights. “And one day,” the lesbian said, “I do believe the pope and the church will be apologizing about their treatment of homosexuals over the millennia.” Now as if to show who is dumber, CNN anchor Kyra Phillips then asked, “Well, he’s beginning to apologize, isn’t he?” To which Martina said, “Yes, he—they’re figuring it out. It’s just—it’s a matter of time. We know we’re right, and one day we’ll be proven right. Hopefully it’s not too far away.” We’re surprised Kyra didn’t say something brilliant, like, “yeah, baby, maybe it’ll be a week from Tuesday.”
Bishop Spong, for those who are lucky enough never to have heard of him, has made a living out of bashing Christianity; this explains why he now teach at Harvard. As one might expect, he has a particular fondness for Catholicism. He is known for questioning Jesus’ virgin birth and the Resurrection, which is on the order of an official of the Flat Earth Society questioning the flatness of the earth.
In his recently released autobiography, Spong blasted “strident fundamentalist Protestantism, an antiquated Roman Catholicism, and an irrelevant Orthodox tradition.” He concluded, “I see no hope for a Christian future in any of them.” What he really means is that he hopes the Christian future isn’t shaped by these forces. No wonder he’s depressed.
The good news is that both Navratilova and Spong are retired. The bad news is that they now have more time to indulge their fantasies in public than ever before. The good news is that their thoughts are so jaded that all but a few won’t be able to see through them. The bad news is that those who work at CNN and attend Harvard are not in the majority.