CATHOLIC LEAGUE TO HUGH HEFNER: “JUST SAY NO” TO VIAGRA

The July issue of Playboy has a picture of Hugh Hefner praying with the three stars of “Charlie’s Angels 2”; Lucy Liu, Cameron Diaz and Drew Barrymore are dressed as nuns in full habit.  There is also a picture of Hefner with his arm draped around a large statue of the Virgin Mary.  It seems that “Charlie’s Angels” and Hefner were taking time out between scenes of the new movie when they decided to transform the Playboy Mansion into what they call “Our Lady of Perpetual Virginity.”

Catholic League president William Donohue was unimpressed:

“Hugh Hefner (affectionately known as Hef) was wearing his smoking jacket when he got religion.  Which makes me wonder—what was he smoking?  Now it is possible that Hef has genuinely been born again, but given the fact that he still has that same hallmark stupid grin on his face, it’s doubtful.  A more persuasive answer is that his fondness for Viagra has something to do with his conversion.

“Hef recently labeled Viagra ‘the best recreational drug ever invented.’  But before he gets his spirits up too high, Hef should ponder the side effects of the wonder drug.  They include headaches, stomach upsets, nasal congestion, backache, muscle ache, dizziness and hot flashes.  That’s it—it’s the dizziness and the hot flashes that account for Hef’s transformation.

“While we are delighted that his spiritual epiphany has led him to discover the one true religion, we nonetheless suggest he quit taking Viagra immediately.  This may not be easy but it also may not be as hard as he thinks.  In any event, once he comes down and gets back to where he was, then perhaps he can begin his quest for religion once again.  Our advice to Hef—‘just say no’ to Viagra.  And just leave our religion out of it next time.”


Share

Written by Bill