Bill Donohue comments on the Comedy Central program “Tosh.0” that aired last night:

Daniel Tosh hosted a mock game show, “American Christians got hella Talent” which featured the “Holy Trinity of judges.” God was represented as an empty chair. Jesus was described as being fond of “fishing for men” [gay innuendo]. And the Holy Ghost was someone with a white sheet over his head. The judges commented on a series of faux performers.

The first act was “Fr. Flanagan and the hairless angels.” A man dressed as a priest did a provocative dance with two young boys dressed as altar boys. The dance ended with the priest hugging the boys. Tosh said, “that’s a slippery slope Fr. Flanagan.”  After the performance the judges offered their comments; Jesus refused to judge the man, and God responded “we’re here to judge, don’t be such a p*ssy.”

Another act featured a rabbi who the judges disqualified. Tosh asked the judges “[are] you still upset about that whole crucifixion thing?” As the panel watched other fake contestants, Tosh interjected at one point, “you can cut the tension in this room with a nail through the palm.”

The sketch ended with a bizarre sequence about the film “X-Men” and included God defending X-Men’s director, Bryan Singer, against recent accusations that he sexually abused children.

Tosh has crossed the line before – he has a history of painting all priests as pedophiles and attacking the pope – but this was a new low for him.

Contact Carl Folta, Executive VP, Corporate Communications, Viacom:  Carl.Folta@viacom.com

Bill Donohue comments on the latest developments in the Catholic League’s boycott of Guinness:

We are contacting over 200 Irish pubs in New York City and asking them to join our boycott of Guinness.

Next week, and in the weeks that follow, we will announce the names of other cities where the pub owners will be asked to join our boycott.

To sign our Boycott Guinness Petition click here.

Contact Alix Dunn at Diageo, parent company of Guinness: Alix.Dunn@diageo.com

Bill Donohue explains why he opposes a boycott of Israel:

I am happy that my Jewish friends have asked for the support of the Catholic League in protesting the inclusion of Boycott Israel groups in the Israel Day Parade. We are glad to lend our support. The “100 Shofars Rally,” which is being held to protest this issue, will take place on April 29 from 5:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m. in front of the UJA-Federation Building at 130 E. 59th Street (between Park and Lexington).

The obscene, and totally hypocritical, sponsorship of the Boycott Israel campaign picked up steam last December when the American Studies Association voted to boycott Israel’s institutions of higher education. If these people were interested in justice, they would commend Israel, not condemn it.

The Jewish community can depend on the support of the Catholic League in protesting all Boycott Israel campaigns.

Bill Donohue comments on the latest developments in the Catholic League’s boycott of Guinness:

We are contacting all 14 regional offices of the Holy Name Society, and over 100 of its officers. Additionally, we are reaching out to 175 Catholic War Veterans posts across the country. We are asking them to join our boycott of Guinness.

Next week, and in the weeks that follow, we will announce more organizations that we are contacting to join our boycott.

Contact Alix Dunn at Diageo, parent company of Guinness: Alix.Dunn@diageo.com

Bill Donohue explains why Maureen Dowd is a phony:

If Maureen Dowd had guts, she would demand the resignation of her boss, Mark Thompson, president and CEO of the New York Times.

In her column today, Dowd rails against the canonization of Pope John Paul II, saying, “he presided over the Catholic Church during nearly three decades of a gruesome pedophilia scandal and grotesque cover-up.”

Dowd ought to get her facts straight: there was no pedophilia scandal—less than five percent of molesting priests were pedophiles—it was homosexuals who accounted for 81 percent of the sexual abuse cases. The facts are incontrovertible. So it’s time she stopped her cover-up.

More important, Thompson worked at the BBC for decades, and claimed to know nothing about the BBC’s biggest child molestation case in its history: Jimmy Savile was a true pedophile, raping hundreds of children. Both Savile and Thompson worked at the BBC for decades; Thompson was Director General from 2004-2012. And unlike John Paul II, we have proof that Thompson lied: after Savile died in October 2011, a “Newsnight” story exposing his conduct was spiked, and Thompson said he knew nothing about it. In fact, he was told about the cover-up at a Christmas party that year. On top of that, he told his BBC lawyers in September 2012 to write a letter to The Sunday Times threatening to sue if they ran a letter implicating him in the Savile matter. His only concern was to land a plum job at the New York Times (he was set to join the Times on November 12, but events forced him to wait).

According to Dowd, the pope is supposed to know exactly what is going on in an organization of 1.2 billion, but somehow we are supposed to believe that Thompson knew nothing about Savile when he presided over an organization of 23,000. Everyone else seemed to know about Savile’s rapes, so why didn’t Thompson?

It’s time Dowd showed some guts and demanded that Thompson resign.

Bill Donohue comments on criminalizing God in the public schools:

Militant atheists have a new goal: they object to students hearing the name of God in the Pledge of Allegiance. No atheist has to say the Pledge, or utter the dreaded words, “under God”—it is optional—but that is not enough: they want to stop others from saying it.

The American Humanist Association is suing a New Jersey school district because state law requires students to say the Pledge. Since 1943, students have been able to opt out of saying it under federal law (the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that Jehovah’s Witnesses did not have to say it because its members held that the flag salute constituted idolatry).

Regarding state law, in 2010, the very liberal Ninth Circuit upheld the words “under God” for their “ceremonial and patriotic nature”; the judges said it was not a violation of the First Amendment. Later that year, the U.S. Supreme Court denied an appeal of a unanimous ruling by the First Circuit that also said that the inclusion of “under God” did not violate anyone’s rights. In all cases, no student was required to recite the Pledge.

The American Humanist Association, and its ilk, are not satisfied to opt out of saying the Pledge of Allegiance. They want the government to silence everyone from saying it.

We do not have to worry about the Taliban in the United States—religious fanatics are properly impotent. But we do have to worry about their secular counterpart—atheist fanatics. It is their impotence that we must secure.

 Contact American Humanist Association President Rebecca Hale: rhale@americanhumanist.org

Bill Donohue comments on Seth Meyers’ latest crack about Catholics:

Seth Meyers must know some good jokes about Jewish girls, though we haven’t heard any. He’s got to have a stock of jokes ripping on Muslim gals, but again we’ve never heard any of them. But when it comes to Catholic girls, we know what Meyers thinks of them.

Last night, Meyers did a segment, “Venn Diagrams,” where he sought to find common ground between two apparently unrelated subjects. He compared “The Second Half of the Final Season of ‘Mad Men'” [the TV show] with “Catholic Girls.” The common thread was, “You Have to Wait Before You Get To See it All.”

Meyers’ writers have Catholics on their mind. On March 6, he made a quip about the pope and Jesus. On April 3, Meyers discussed “Philomena,” a movie we exposed for its vicious lies about nuns; one of the movie’s stars, Steve Coogan, who predicted that he would garner an Oscar (he came away empty-handed), whined about the criticism leveled at the film. On April 8, Meyers announced that a faux Catholic Digest ran an article titled, “Global Warming: It’s Because You Touched Yourself.” There have been other shots at Catholics, as well.

We never said anything about Meyers’ new show until now. While we have heard worse, there is a disturbing pattern evolving. His show is only a few months old, and it is already clear that he has a Catholic fixation. We hope he gets over it quickly.

Contact NBC media director, Lauren Roseman: Lauren.roseman@nbcuni.com

Bill Donohue comments on last night’s TV show ratings:

On Easter Sunday night, more Americans watched “The Ten Commandments” on ABC than any other show, even allowing for the fact that the audience was not as big as last year’s. What was most telling was how it creamed the religious fare shown on the Travel Channel and the Science Channel.

The Travel Channel gave us “Greatest Mysteries: Holy Land,” a one-hour presentation that took the viewer on a rambling ride through hidden rooms and caves looking for the Holy Grail; a guest appearance by Heinrich Himmler, head of the Nazi SS, rounded out the first segment. The Shroud of Turin was featured in the second segment: the audience was asked to consider whether the cloth’s impression was the face of Leonardo da Vinci. Another segment speculated on whether there is a hidden code and cipher in the Torah. Finally, we learned that Judas, who betrayed Jesus, was actually his best buddy.

The Science Channel gave us two programs. The first explored why nefarious Church leaders sought to suppress some non-canonical gospels. Predictably, the Gospel of Mary posits that the male-dominated Church did not want to deal with a woman (who may have been the leader of the apostles!). The second program called into question many biblical accounts of Christ’s birth, death, and resurrection.

It is striking that a Christian-themed entertainment movie offers a more accurate historical account of the Bible than programs that purport to be scientific. Unfortunately, what passes as scientific these days is often more sci-fi than real, more myth than fact, and more idle speculation than collected data.

It only goes to show that the average American is a lot smarter than the elites who seek to manipulate them.

Bill Donohue comments on Planned Parenthood’s bigotry:

Tomorrow night in Seattle, Planned Parenthood will stage “Bar Nun Bingo” at Poquitos in the Capitol Hill neighborhood; two days later, it will hold another “Bar Nun Bingo,” this time at the downtown Pike Brewing Company. Both fund-raising events will bash nuns, and will be led by the demonstrably anti-Catholic gay group, Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. Pictures of previous “Bar Nun Bingo” affairs show how sick it is.

Planned Parenthood has a long history of Catholic bashing. Its founder, Margaret Sanger, was both a racist and an anti-Catholic. In 1987, it trashed Mother Teresa, calling her an “old and withered person, who doesn’t look the least like a woman.” In 1994, it mocked the Eucharist at the Monmouth County Fair in New Jersey. In 1995, it blamed New York Archbishop John Cardinal O’Connor for the killing of an abortion doctor in Brookline, Massachusetts. In 1998, its opposition to school vouchers led it to brand the Catholic Church an “extremist” group on Long Island.

In 1999, Planned Parenthood passed out green condoms on the eve of St. Patrick’s Day at the state Capitol in Connecticut. That same year it sought to oust the Holy See from its non-member state permanent observer status at the U.N. In 2000, it accused Pope John Paul II of waging “war” against the “sexual and reproductive rights” of women. In 2009, one of its male leaders in Florida dressed as a pregnant nun at a Halloween party; others joined him in a “Safe Sex Bash.” It regularly insults Christians at Christmas with its “Choice on Earth” program. And so on.

Planned Parenthood receives more than half a billion in tax dollars per year, a quarter of which comes from Catholics. We are writing to Tennessee Rep. Marsha Blackburn, who has introduced a bill prohibiting public funds for abortion providers, about Planned Parenthood’s bigotry. We urge everyone to contact her.

 Contact Rep. Blackburn’s office: marsha.blackburn@mail.house.gov

Bill Donohue comments on Conan O’Brien:

On April 14, Conan O’Brien made fun of Pope Francis. On April 15, he made fun of Jesus. We said nothing about these two jokes because they were not insulting, and we are not in the business of criticizing comedians when they take light-hearted jabs at our religion. But last night was different.

In his April 16 monologue, Conan said the following: “The pope let two 11-year-old boys ride in the popemobile with him. Afterwards the Vatican told the pope ‘that’s not the kind of publicity we’re looking for.'”

By perpetuating the stereotype that priests are child molesters, Conan O’Brien discredits himself and foments hatred of priests. We make critical distinctions at the Catholic League between disagreement and derision, and we expect no less from late-night talk-show hosts and their writers.

Contact Conan’s publicity agent, Drew Shane: drew.shane@conacotv.com